Let’s start with romantic love (because many relationships do). It excites, fascinates and obsesses, propelling people out of the everyday on to a magic carpet ride to a whole new world. Romantic love can be positive.
It can motivate kindness, bring wonderful feelings that you matter and that life is good, and can make you aware of your spiritual side beyond humdrum life. It can also grow into a deeper and more realistic love.
Yet there are dangers in romance. It can blind us to reality and cause an unwise choice of a partner. It can be mere escapism that does not stand up in real life. Its ending can cause pain and discouragement.
What makes romantic love so powerful?
In their must-read book Really Relating, David Jansen and Margaret Newman outline some of the forces that exist in the subconscious mind, that part of us that lies beneath the surface of our consciousness like an iceberg—and often causes titanic disasters.